Things to do when you’re trying not to think about that one thing:

Standard
  1. Sit in a funky wicker chair and relax. Of course, if you stay in the same chair long enough the world  will march past slowly like a line of ants.  You’ll see chunks of cheese on antennae and you’ll grow hungry. So prepare a snack if you choose this option.
  2. Organize your life synesthetically. For example, piles of white paper smell like velvet so they should be stowed with everything that feels like purple.
  3. Invite your friends over to drink wine. Write down their phrases that sound dirty out of context and promise to arrange them into a blog post. Type them into your word processor and giggle, all the while with no idea how to arrange them into anything that other people will find amusing.
  4. Take up scrapbooking but with your very own special twist. Keep scrapbooks of serial killers and convince your friends you suffer from hybristophilia. You’ll be the talk of the town before you know it, and your won’t have time to dwell on that thing anymore.
  5. Express your feelings in shoebox diorama form. Helpful hints: use gray tissue paper to articulate sadness, and hide your dioramas under your bed so your family doesn’t have you committed.

6 thoughts on “Things to do when you’re trying not to think about that one thing:

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