My daughter brought home BJ Novak’s The Book With No Pictures from the school library last week. It’s a delightful book that we read 100 times before she returned it. But as a struggling writer, I have to acknowledge that for every children’s book that gets published (I was going to go into a rant here about celebrity books getting special treatment but I can’t because BJ Novak is a hella good writer), there are a thousand or so that never make it to the bookshelves. Here’s a small sampling of children’s books that you’ll never have the opportunity to read:
Your Parents Got a Divorce Because You’re a Jerk
You’re Right, Your Boobs Will Never Grow
When You’re Naughty God Kills a Child in Africa
Everybody Thinks You’re Weird
Santa Does Exist Because He’s the Devil
Your Mom is a Stripper, Not a Ballerina
Your Spirit Animal is an Earthworm
There’s a Portal to Hell in Your Basement But It Won’t Swallow You If You Obey Your Parents
So the next time you read a good book, please take a second to consider the writers who work hard every day only to be told that their books aren’t good enough or too creepy for children. Just because kids are sissies doesn’t mean that a talented writer’s voice should be ignored.
Thanks for always reading, Carolyn!
Keep going Penni Jones!!!
Thank you so much, Brigid!!
you didn’t share that All those books were written by you. Come on… fess up.
They are all on my list of projects I need to get to, Jeanne!